The Diaper-free Baby: the Natural Toilet Training Alternative

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· 766 ratings · 131 reviews

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Jan 11, 2016 Ricki rated it really liked it

Here's my conclusion after reading several potty-training books. I think that no matter what you do, there is a very good chance that potty-training is going to be a long time commitment and huge hassle. You can do the work in the beginning (EC, from birth to possibly only up to a year), the middle (early potty-training, from 6mo to 2 years), or the end (after 2 years). With my twins, I waited until the end, because people told me to "wait until they're ready" and basically they would train them Here's my conclusion after reading several potty-training books. I think that no matter what you do, there is a very good chance that potty-training is going to be a long time commitment and huge hassle. You can do the work in the beginning (EC, from birth to possibly only up to a year), the middle (early potty-training, from 6mo to 2 years), or the end (after 2 years). With my twins, I waited until the end, because people told me to "wait until they're ready" and basically they would train themselves. Well, the kids are a few months away from 3, it's been a mess of toddler power struggles, and they still aren't really potty-trained yet (one of them is still peeing her pants regularly). At this point it's obviously a mental problem rather than one of physical readiness, which is a bit aggravating because they have proved they CAN do it and for some reason now just won't.

But obviously it's an individual choice to decide when a person wants to put in the work of potty-training. Therefore, here are my recommendations:

If you have a new baby and are intrigued by the idea of EC, I recommend:
Diaper Free: The Gentle Wisdom of Natural Infant Hygiene by Ingrid Bauer - makes elimination communication sound very appealing, although a heavy up-front commitment.
The Diaper-Free Baby: The Natural Toilet Training Alternative by Christine Gross-Loh - Explains that even doing EC part-time can show great benefits, and gives stress-free, practical ways to make EC fit into your busy life.

If you are interested in early potty-training and avoiding toddler power-struggles, I recommend:
Diaper-Free Before 3: The Healthier Way to Toilet Train and Help Your Child Out of Diapers Sooner by Jill M. Lekovic. I appreciated the scientific studies and medical evidence that supports early potty-training. I actually think this might be the easiest way and it's what I'm doing with kid #3. If it works for my newest bub, I will start giving this book out at baby showers, with the caveat that the author is totally wrong about cloth diapers. (She knows that cloth diapers with natural fibers such as cotton against baby's bum are conducive to early potty-training because baby will feel the wetness when peeing. However, she still advises against cloth diapers because she thinks they're a big pain and don't really help the environment—when in fact they aren't a big deal and hugely save the environment AND a ton of money.) But besides that, this book is crammed with good stuff and it's my fave.

If your kid is already 2 or over, I recommend:
Oh Crap! Potty Training by Jamie Glowacki. This book described my toddler twins to an absolute T and really helped me. I wish I'd discovered it six months earlier than I did. It's very funny and for my children at least it was eerily accurate. Huge recommendation to anyone starting with a toddler—read this ASAP!

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Dec 10, 2010 Tiffany rated it it was amazing

As someone who's already hooked on cloth diapers, I sort of stumbled upon elimination communication (or EC or infant potty learning or whatever you want to call it) by accident while visiting some cloth diaper-friendly online forums. I found the idea intuitive and interesting, and so did the hubbs. This book is great because it breaks down each infant development stage (newborn, middle infancy, toddlerhood, etc) for toilet hygiene based on whether you're interested in full-time, part-time, or oc As someone who's already hooked on cloth diapers, I sort of stumbled upon elimination communication (or EC or infant potty learning or whatever you want to call it) by accident while visiting some cloth diaper-friendly online forums. I found the idea intuitive and interesting, and so did the hubbs. This book is great because it breaks down each infant development stage (newborn, middle infancy, toddlerhood, etc) for toilet hygiene based on whether you're interested in full-time, part-time, or occasional EC. Encouraging, concise, and full of great stories of success from other parents, this is a great book for any parent interested in expanding their horizons of communication and care for their babies.

Disclaimer: It is NOT a "toilet training" help book and in no way makes the method of ECing out to be about potty training. The basis of the book is communicating needs—just like a baby will "cue" when it's hungry, almost all babies "cue" when they need to go to the bathroom. Why not put a baby over a toilet if you know they're going to poop instead of waiting to clean up the sometimes explosive aftermath?

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Feb 03, 2008 Andrea rated it liked it

Hmmm...definitely intriguing but not too sure that I'm going to apply it. The concept is that humans are not programmed to soil themselves but we teach our babies to use the bathroom in their pants and hang out in it until we change them, so that when we start potty training them at 2 1/2 or 3, we are having to teach them not to go to the bathroom in their pants although they've been doing that their whole lives. The book teaches you to be in tune with your child's bathroom schedule/routine and Hmmm...definitely intriguing but not too sure that I'm going to apply it. The concept is that humans are not programmed to soil themselves but we teach our babies to use the bathroom in their pants and hang out in it until we change them, so that when we start potty training them at 2 1/2 or 3, we are having to teach them not to go to the bathroom in their pants although they've been doing that their whole lives. The book teaches you to be in tune with your child's bathroom schedule/routine and to know the signs she gives when she is going. Then you cue the child with a sound and sign so that eventually, when you put the child on the potty and cue them, they will go. It focuses on communicating with your child and knowing her signs just like you know her signs for being hungry or tired. It is not focused on getting your child out of diapers at a world-record age. Also, it discusses how in many cultures around the world, babies don't use diapers and are potty trained at a very young age. Interesting concept, as I said. ...more

My wife insisted I read it well before we ever have a baby. I think it covers all the bases and describes well what "diaper-free baby" means.

You know, one of the major criticisms I might have is the very title of "Diaper Free Baby". I prefer the subtitle "Natural Toilet Training" because I feel like that more closely aligns with what is actually going on here.

Anyway, I read through the newborn and toddler sections thoroughly and found it to be pretty complete. I am not one to find quotes from su

My wife insisted I read it well before we ever have a baby. I think it covers all the bases and describes well what "diaper-free baby" means.

Anyway, I read through the newborn and toddler sections thoroughly and found it to be pretty complete. I am not one to find quotes from successful users overly compelling, but I suppose that works for some folks. However, I do find the appeals to logic convincing--e.g. the explanation that this is how things are done in many non-Western nations already and how historically humans have toiled trained.

I also liked the parts that explained how to get others in your life on board with the philosophy. To me, convincing grandparents and other close people to understand why you're doing it and what it is can be difficult, so some guidance there was great.

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Jan 25, 2010 Dawn rated it it was ok

Some intriguing concepts, but it could have been a lot shorter. As in pamphlet-sized.

Jul 17, 2009 Rebecca rated it really liked it

This book doesn't break new ground, but it does lay it down gently for the uninitiated. If you've never heard of Infant Potty Training or Elimination Communication, this book is a great introduction for you. If you're curious about how you might go about trying it for yourself, this book is encouraging and full of helpful hints, tips, and lists of where to get or make the few essentials (a potty, training pants or baby panties, etc). There is a subtle humor in the book and none of the alarmist o This book doesn't break new ground, but it does lay it down gently for the uninitiated. If you've never heard of Infant Potty Training or Elimination Communication, this book is a great introduction for you. If you're curious about how you might go about trying it for yourself, this book is encouraging and full of helpful hints, tips, and lists of where to get or make the few essentials (a potty, training pants or baby panties, etc). There is a subtle humor in the book and none of the alarmist or conspiracy-frightened about it. If I were asked by someone to recommend a book about EC to a total stranger, this would be it. If I wanted to recommend a book about EC to someone who was convinced conventional diapering was not helping their child, I would suggest another... ...more

Feb 19, 2018 Jessica rated it did not like it

This book is 99% fluff. It has enough content to support a single blog post, and the rest is all useless rambling and parent testimonial after parent testimonial.

I read this book because I had an 18 month old (who doesn't really speak yet) peeing all over my house, and someone suggested that elimination communication was a wonderful, respectful way to help young toddlers and even babies learn to use the toilet. It's more like clicker training your dog, though.

The one thing I got out of the book

This book is 99% fluff. It has enough content to support a single blog post, and the rest is all useless rambling and parent testimonial after parent testimonial.

The one thing I got out of the book was they do give a few physical signs that indicate your child may need to poop or pee, and that at least helped me some with our peeing plight.

Still, would not recommend it. You can find that information for free on google with a little bit of digging (I know, I did).

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Jun 29, 2015 Emilia P rated it really liked it

I have a friend who is doing EC and though I do not have anywhere near the discipline to do so exclusively myself, this book did a really nice thing by saying "hey, you can do this part-time like, even once a day, if you want! or less!" and also "hey, if you screw up sometimes its not a huge deal" and "this is about communication with your child, not about Training per se." So in general, I liked Gross-Loh's approach to parenting philosophy -- like, don't beat yourself up about it or try to do i I have a friend who is doing EC and though I do not have anywhere near the discipline to do so exclusively myself, this book did a really nice thing by saying "hey, you can do this part-time like, even once a day, if you want! or less!" and also "hey, if you screw up sometimes its not a huge deal" and "this is about communication with your child, not about Training per se." So in general, I liked Gross-Loh's approach to parenting philosophy -- like, don't beat yourself up about it or try to do it perfectly, but hey? isn't this fairly logical? Aren't Indian grandmas on to something? Indeed. Maybe I will attempt this a little more with hypothetical infant #2. ...more

I really appreciated that, unlike many parenting books, this isn't all-or-nothing. Gross-Lo provides three tracks to EC and a number of starting points, from never using a nappy from birth to giving a toddler some nappy free time and cueing once in a while. It's gentle, encouraging and nonjudgmental.

My major criticism is that, like most single theme parenting books, it stretches a little content a long, long way. It's heavily padded with anecdotes, true or invented. The information on baby weari

My major criticism is that, like most single theme parenting books, it stretches a little content a long, long way. It's heavily padded with anecdotes, true or invented. The information on baby wearing also promotes cross body slings while failing to warn of their dangers.

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Zero intention of making a lifestyle of this, but some very good ideas for a realistic approach to introducing baby to standard toileting practices. Throughout history and in many other countries (including China and India) the methods discussed in this book are standard practice, and the American way of doing things is the aberration. This is the lightweight offering in this genre, and you literally could not pay me to read one of the thicker tomes on this subject.

Jan 26, 2016 B Zimp rated it liked it

A detailed text on teaching Elimination Communication. Yep, these are the people that have their babies use the toilet (just like the rest of the non-developed world). Written in a very compelling way that explain techniques, history, and problem-solving in a very non-judgmental way. My kids are a bit old for most of the recommendations, but it was still an informative read that offers ideas for early potty-trainers.

Jan 28, 2017 Caitlinleah rated it really liked it

This is a GREAT EC book. Parenting is so hard, I thought EC would be another thing that was impossible with an actual baby. But the author is great about showing how any steps are good steps and it's all about communication, not about results. I plan on continuing to use cloth diapers and I feel like there's still so much I learned from this book. I hope even awareness will make toilet learning easier, whenever it ends up happening for us. This is a GREAT EC book. Parenting is so hard, I thought EC would be another thing that was impossible with an actual baby. But the author is great about showing how any steps are good steps and it's all about communication, not about results. I plan on continuing to use cloth diapers and I feel like there's still so much I learned from this book. I hope even awareness will make toilet learning easier, whenever it ends up happening for us. ...more

Feb 14, 2020 Mia rated it it was ok

Offers good info for getting started from birth up to 18 months, but doesn't discuss how to reach "completion" (potty trained). Glosses over potty pauses like they'll fix themselves. Potty pauses and completion are literally one combined chapter.

May 22, 2021 Ari rated it really liked it

I checked this book out from the library. If you're on a budget and cannot get this book from the library, you may want to consult the internet rather than buying this book at full price. That all being said, I consider it worth the money if you're not hard on cash and think it would suit your needs!

I am actually planning on doing EC with my child when she is born, so I found the information personally useful. I was already familiar with the concept but enjoyed having a full book on the subject

I am actually planning on doing EC with my child when she is born, so I found the information personally useful. I was already familiar with the concept but enjoyed having a full book on the subject to digest more slowly than web articles.

I agree with the criticisms that this book could be condensed down into a blog post, and there are a lot of testimonials. However, personally, the testimonials were actually my favorite part. I liked reading the advice and experiences of other parents.

The whole tone of the book is very encouraging and accepting. She reminds the reader often that EC is not an all-or-nothing kind of thing, which is refreshing considering the condescending tone most people use when giving parenting advice.

In general I found this to be an enjoyable read. I might just be weird as I do prefer nonfiction in general, this is the kind of thing I read for leisure. Your mileage may vary!

I recommend this book to anyone who prefers to read on paper rather than from a screen and is planning on trying EC. Otherwise, this book may not be for you and that's okay.

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Aug 08, 2020 Heather rated it really liked it

Paul and I are trying this potty technique, elimination communication (EC) with our baby. So far, it's going pretty well.

We're hoping that taking our baby to the toilet will mean early potty training, but I recognize that the book specifically says that's not the point--communication with your baby before they can speak their needs is the point.

The book gets one star knocked off because about half of the content is quotes from other parents who are all like "we were skeptical or so-and-so was s

Paul and I are trying this potty technique, elimination communication (EC) with our baby. So far, it's going pretty well.

The book gets one star knocked off because about half of the content is quotes from other parents who are all like "we were skeptical or so-and-so was skeptical because of this and that, but then we tried EC and it was great."

Overall, though, I think it's a great idea, and I like the encouragement that you can just try it sometimes--that anything at all helps to maintain your baby's mental connection between the feelings in their body and using the toilet.

So, we're just trying by giving her opportunities ("pottytunities") to go, and hoping we catch most of her poops. Makes clean up way easier so far.

We also don't let her go totally "diaper-free," but have a cloth diapering service for now, which helps. Supposedly cloth diapers still feel wetter than disposables to a baby, so it helps them not to lose the connection between their brain and the sensation of going to the bathroom.

Hey, at least it's something to do when you're stuck at home with a baby during a global pandemic.

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Read cover to cover to get the full understanding of what she is teaching. Do not skip to your babies age like I did. I missed a lot. It isn't bad book and it has a lot of advice. Yet more then half the book is quotes from encouraging parents and somehow I did not feel encouraged. I felt mostly like a failure because I did not understand what cues my kid could have or how timing worked. My kid does not go at the same time every day nor do I get a lovely display of pre-eliminatiom messages. All I Read cover to cover to get the full understanding of what she is teaching. Do not skip to your babies age like I did. I missed a lot. It isn't bad book and it has a lot of advice. Yet more then half the book is quotes from encouraging parents and somehow I did not feel encouraged. I felt mostly like a failure because I did not understand what cues my kid could have or how timing worked. My kid does not go at the same time every day nor do I get a lovely display of pre-eliminatiom messages. All I get is the I am pooping face and the look a puddle face. It wasn't till I really finished the book that I realized this method is not for children 18 months and up even though they have a section for children one year of age. There are no examples of children learning at that stage. Plenty of examples of children mastering the skill at that point! So I will save this method for future children because it makes a lot of sense to me. Just wish they were clear about what they mean by a one year old... ...more

This review took me a few days to ponder. Why? Because this book was pretty life changing to me and I wanted to do it justice! ⁣
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If you've never heard of infant potty training or elimination communication I highly recommend this book. The author hasn't got an all-or-nothing approach. She thoroughly explains that anyone can implement EC into their life and that the benefits completely outweigh the negatives.⁣
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I was mind blown by how logical and natural this whole approach is. You know when you fi This review took me a few days to ponder. Why? Because this book was pretty life changing to me and I wanted to do it justice! ⁣
⁣
If you've never heard of infant potty training or elimination communication I highly recommend this book. The author hasn't got an all-or-nothing approach. She thoroughly explains that anyone can implement EC into their life and that the benefits completely outweigh the negatives.⁣
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I was mind blown by how logical and natural this whole approach is. You know when you find a lifestyle or philosophy and you tell yourself "This makes so much sense to me!" Or "This aligns so much with my world view!" Well this book was exactly like that for me. It also saddened me greatly to realise how far out of touch we have become with our bodies and their function! ⁣
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I am so looking forward to trying this technique with my firstborn and see where it leads us.⁣ ...more

Jul 13, 2020 Meg rated it liked it

Solid information on how to practice elimination communication with your baby, but it could have been more concise - the book probably could have been less than 100 pages. It got pretty repetitive and is full of way too many personal stories from parents who have practiced EC with their own children. Some of their stories do contain useful tips, but I would have rather seen those tips incorporated into the instructions provided by the author rather than having to read direct quotes from parents Solid information on how to practice elimination communication with your baby, but it could have been more concise - the book probably could have been less than 100 pages. It got pretty repetitive and is full of way too many personal stories from parents who have practiced EC with their own children. Some of their stories do contain useful tips, but I would have rather seen those tips incorporated into the instructions provided by the author rather than having to read direct quotes from parents with the names and ages of all of their children on every single one. That said, I do feel like I have a good understanding of what I need to do to start ECing after reading this book. ...more

I wish I found this book when I was pregnant with my first

The first 25% of the book was captivating and I couldn't put it down. As you keep reading, there is a lot of repeat information (which some people might like) so for that 4 stars instead of 5. The information is very useful and I'm going to try these techniques on my two toddlers. I so wish I had discovered this early on in my motherhood journey. All expecting mothers should look into this so they know they have more options.

Jan 01, 2018 Katie rated it liked it

I felt like the author was my cheerleader in trying EC! She offers lots of advice for all stages and ages. I have an older mobile baby that I'd like to start trying this with, but am still concerned about the time and feasibility. I would totally recommend this book to someone who was interested in tying EC, but not your average parent. I kinda think most people think I'm crazy for even reading this.

Sep 13, 2018 Shannon rated it liked it

I read this way back when I was quite intrigued by the idea of my child just potty training himself.(This really does happen with some precocious, fastidious - both elements must be present - babies.) I remember liking it. But alas, my baby sat happily on the potty - even pooped! - from 4 to 8 months, listening to all of his books as we hung out amid the shower steam, and then as soon as he could - he started throwing his plastic throne across the apartment. We stopped soon with this after.

Jan 21, 2021 Koalaj rated it liked it

I do like the idea of EC and diaper free, but I think with all the information the internet provides these days, from blogs to YouTube videos, this book doesn't add anything new.
The black and white pictures in it look like they are from the 80s and some experiences of parents that are printed sound a little cult like.

Still there are some great tips and what I liked most is that there is no pressure on you. The tone of the book is try it out as convenient as it is possible for you.

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Jul 07, 2017 Joyce rated it really liked it

Simple, straight-forward book. I'm glad I read it. It has lots of testimonies from other EC parents, which is encouraging for those many-misses days. I also appreciated that the book stressed that EC was primarily about communication and not about a perfect score of no misses. I wish I had read this book earlier; I think I'll be trying EC with my next one a bit earlier. Simple, straight-forward book. I'm glad I read it. It has lots of testimonies from other EC parents, which is encouraging for those many-misses days. I also appreciated that the book stressed that EC was primarily about communication and not about a perfect score of no misses. I wish I had read this book earlier; I think I'll be trying EC with my next one a bit earlier. ...more

Dec 12, 2020 Tim rated it liked it

Overall, I'm hooked to the idea of EC and we are giving it a try. That said, I found this book incredibly repetitive and somewhat unhelpful. So much of it was simply quotes from under a dozen parents who have tried and succeeded with EC. While the different perspectives were, at times, useful, they made up 60+% of the book, making it a bit too much "fluff" for my taste.

Apr 25, 2019 Andrea rated it really liked it

Very clear, concise intro to the method. I wish I had tried this with my first child too. It's a great way to increase communication and bonding with your baby and it's a great feeling to know there will be less diapers in the landfill as a result!

Feb 01, 2020 Eleanor rated it really liked it

you could also just skip to sections relevant to you and skim. a lot of the content is just quotes/anecdotal accounts. which could be encouraging... but if you just want to know the idea and approach, you could get that in 20-30 minutes.

Jul 15, 2021 Amanda rated it really liked it

Looked for more "transition out of EC and into graduation" info, but the last chapter or two touched on them quickly. The biggest thing to remember: babies are smart, and if you're listening, they can tell you when they're done.

Mar 01, 2017 Alicia rated it it was amazing

Wonderful resource and talks thoroughly about everything you could think of relating to EC, whether starting at 0 days old or 3 years, whether part time or full time doing it.

May 02, 2018 Amy Etzel rated it really liked it

Very informative, covering a wide range of ages and situations!

Jan 10, 2019 Cherie rated it liked it

The diaper-free baby the natural toilet training alternative

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New year, new you! Or perhaps the same you, but a 2.0 version? The start of a new year is known for resolutions, which, as we all know,...

"EC is about communication, about gently getting in harmony with your baby, and proceeding at a pace that feels right for all of you. It's about engaging in a give-and-take on a daily basis and honing those instincts (the same instincts that allow you to sense when your baby is hungry, tired, or overstimulated) that make parenting your own unique baby so rewarding. There's nothing coercive, forced, or pressured about EC." — 0 likes

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The Diaper-free Baby: the Natural Toilet Training Alternative

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The Diaper-free Baby: the Natural Toilet Training Alternative

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